If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
