My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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