Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
