I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
