Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
