hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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