dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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