big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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