We should be called the Road Head Warriors
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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