you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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