people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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