I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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