it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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