listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
