i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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