Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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