She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
