idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Randomize
