he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
