Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
These tits shall not be calmed
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
