wat bout pragnant strippers??
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
