wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Randomize
