my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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