This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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