I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
