you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
