Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
