I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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