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  I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it

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• That's fine. What isn't ok is you texting me while you're drunkenly masturbating!

  Submitted by Phys on May 27, 12 at 4:51pm

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• Well you've got a worm...

  Submitted by kgirl1992 on May 27, 12 at 9:40pm

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  • give him the worm..the bird a worm

    Submitted by nunubeest on May 27, 12 at 9:50pm

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• high five for multitasking... oh wait.

  Submitted by MzKitty08 on May 27, 12 at 10:42pm

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  • down low....oh no

    Submitted by nunubeest on May 27, 12 at 11:41pm

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• We've got no food... no jobs... OUR PETS HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!!!

  Submitted by cp1342 on May 28, 12 at 10:19am

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• That's not the sound of a stray bird. It's the sound of a chicken being choked.

  Submitted by W_T_F on May 28, 12 at 6:32am

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• You fucking rock.

  Submitted by niceman on May 27, 12 at 10:48pm

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• Masturbating in the kitchen again?

  Submitted by JJdoggie on May 27, 12 at 11:18pm

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• omg I finally got submitted to this site I kick assssss <3

  Submitted by that_bakedbitch on May 27, 12 at 11:32pm

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• he's busy choking his own chicken, and can't deal with yours

  Submitted by texastextwhore on Sep 6, 13 at 1:57am

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