is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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