So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
