there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
