Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
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