im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
