I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize