Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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