so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
