Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
