Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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