its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
What a dumb baby whore.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
