i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
