Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
