super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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