Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize