ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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