Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize