I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
