I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
honey bunches of taint.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
