Plan B is the new Plan A
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
