Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
